Midlife Crisis


So you’re half dead. Well, in the figurative sense.

You’re middle age, your body growing older by the minute, you’re anxious about your inevitable mortality, and you’re thinking about all the lack of accomplishments in your tiny meaningless life.

The solution? Buy a motorcycle! Change your wardrobe! Start fucking someone half your age! Relive your younger glory days! Pretend that you’re incessant disintegration isn’t imminent.

The scent of motorcycle exhaust blended with warm cashmere woods and spiced patchouli, with a hint of citrus and mint.

Midlife Crisis. Pretend you’re not an aging failure.

Can’t get enough of our candle scents? Try our Pick-Me-Up Refresher stick!

A convenient roll-on oil that you can use for a splash of fragrance or to freshen up throughout your day. Rolls on silky, absorbs quickly, and gives your aura a little pick-me-up.

Made with only pure fractionated coconut oil and fragrance. This product is chemical & phthalate free.

Dimensions: .3 oz (9ml) – 3 ¼” with cap on – Solid Black glass jar/plastic roller

Not intended for children. If any skin irritation occurs upon use – discard immediately.

Note: We are not responsible if people find you irresistible after using this product. You will have to fight them off all on your own. Sorry.

Additional information

Weight 1 lbs
Dimensions 1.25 x 1.25 x 3.25 in


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